How's it going?

So, I am into week 8 of 9 in my classes.
Foundations of Personal Finance: 93.6%
Introduction to University Studies: 94.25%

I feel awesome due to this. Next week is finals, then I have a few weeks off before I start my next set which is Principles of Health and Wellness and University Composition and Communication 1. I'm rather excited, though I have had some major complications. Hopefully all of those got worked out though.


As for a more personal level:
Life has been strange. I am still moving back to Medford, but it might end up just being for the summer. I have a boyfriend now, he lives in Eugene (he isn't the reason I would move back here) and his name is James. We started dating on the 11th, and honestly, he is the most amazing guy I can ever imagine. He is 22 and I don't know. Everything just clicks with him and I.
The story is: Sophie and I went to Sharis one night and James was our waiter, I thought he was really cute and just charming, so I wrote my number on a napkin. Never heard from him. But anytime I went back, I thought of him. Then on the 10th, Sophie, Patrick and I went on a late night Sharis run, and from the car we saw that he was there. It wasn't till I noticed that he kept looking at me that I decided to leave my number one more time, this time he text me. We hung out the next day and everything just clicked.
I told him that I'll be moving back to Medford for the summer, and he understood. We're going to make it work.
Today will actually be the first day this week that I haven't seen him.

So now, I'm waiting for it to be about 5:50 or so, 'cause I'm going out to Dorena to stay the night at Sophie's dad's house out in the country. I really need to just escape and not be easily accessed. I need time to talk to Soph and just not have the distraction of everything else in the world. I'm excited, though I wont like not being able to talk to James. Lol.

Great... all my dreams keep going up in flames.

So you know how I said a few days ago that it seemed everything was falling into place with school: scratch that. I got a call today with my adviser mad at me because now I have to get two papers signed by my father or else I can't do my next set of classes that starts on the 25th.
Why does it seem like once I finally start getting what I want it all goes up in flames?! I honestly feel like I'm just not meant to do this anymore, I'm so tired of getting torn apart time after time. I know, whatever, "it's part of life" but seriously?! My dream was to become an amazing dance teacher like the one I had, then I get injured and am forced to quit school due to it. After I move away from a town I had fallen in love with I find out that there is now this large sum of money that I owe.
Then I get stuck living in a town I hate and can't wait to get out of, but I figured I should be the optimist that I am and figure out ways to make it better so I get jobs that I adore and I get back into school for a degree that I have a new found passion for: psychology.
I was finally doing well in school, and now I'm practically being forced to take a leave of absence because I can't get two papers signed by my dad before my classes start.
It isn't my fault that I'm broke and don't have a printer and scanner, nor is it my fault that my dad isn't tech savvy enough to have his own computer, printer and scanner. Why am I the one being punished for this?! Why can't I finally just be in school and getting a degree?! Am I not supposed to? Am I just supposed to give up at this point, because one more push towards that cliff and I'll cry Uncle and give up.
I feel crushed. I feel torn apart. and worse, when I tried to talk to my mom about it, all I could feel was like she was blaming me for this.
I don't have the time to go down to the library and figure out how to do all of this crap, nor do I even know where a library is in this stupid town. I don't have the money to go get a printer and scanner. I don't have anything to where I can do this myself and I'm sorry for that but it isn't my fault.
But I sure feel like it is....

I Am A Dancer

Oh my goodness, I'm seriously about to cry right now. After a hard day at work, I went and checked the mail. I got a letter from my student loan stuff saying that it has finally gone through that I am a student everything is in order for me to get my loans and scholarships. Then there was also a letter from World Poetry Movement. My poem "I'm A Dancer" has been selected for the International Open Poetry Contest, I am now a semi-finalist. It has also been selected to be published in the book Stars In Our Hearts, if I give permission.
Then to add on to the great news, my financial adviser from Phoenix called and everything is finally in order so that the school can now receive my scholarships.
I am seriously rather close to tears right now.




"I am a dancer.
I wonder what the audience sees.
I hear my cue to come on stage.
I see my partner in the other wings.
I want that trophy and applause.
I am a dancer.
I pretend that I can dance when I'm hurt.
I feel the spotlight on my face.
I touch the stage with my toes.
I worry about messing up.
I cry when I feel like I'm the reason.
I am a dancer.
I understand stage directions.
I say I can do it all.
I dream about taking that stage.
I try to not fall.
I hope my instructors are proud.
I am a dancer. "

I wrote this poem a long time ago, and I turned it in to a writing contest. I am now a semi finalist. This is insane.